top 5 self care tips

2018, mental health

Hello!

I’ll be honest, this week has already been tough and it’s only Wednesday – I won’t go into details but it has made me think about what I need to do to look after myself, and I’m working on listening to my body more and making sure I was doing something that wasn’t detrimental for me in the long run.

The thing with self-care is that it’s all very personal – you can watch a hundred different self care videos and read blog posts but none of them will be a quick fix or perfect for you, not quite anyway. But they can give you ideas – something to try that maybe you hadn’t thought of, different things work for different people but sharing what works for an individual might be useful for someone else, which is why we should share!

I’ve made a video on this before – it was about a year ago and things have changed since then which is why I want to talk about it again.

(But here it is in case anyone fancies a watch!)

So this is my new list of self care practices that I’m using right now!

  1. Properly resting – not keeping myself busy, or trying to tick something off my to do list. Not necessarily sleeping but taking time to just watch TV or YouTube without doing anything else – not trying to multitask. Giving my brain a break and not trying to max out productivity at all time. And also sleeping more regularly – I go to bed about 10pm and get up between 7am and 8am and that’s working quite well for me at the moment.
  2. Spending time cooking – I find cooking really therapeutic and when I’m making something that doesn’t involve just chucking it in the oven and serving it, when I really cook and make something from scratch it’s just so satisfying. Especially where I’m really trying to focus on my diet and losing weight at the moment (which is proving quite the challenge for my mental health, I’m incredibly self aware of dark though patterns, it’s draining) so cooking with lots of vegetables and knowing exactly what’s going in to what I’m eating and it makes the diet a bit easier on the brain. But spending an hour so a night on making dinner just really helps me focus and relax.
  3. Talk to someone supportive – this is quite a personal one, as I’m aware that not everyone is lucky enough to have someone supportive in their circle that they trust to talk to when they’re feeling down, but I’m so glad that I have someone that does. But there are some people that are the opposite of supportive – they make you feel like a literal pile of poo because they don’t understand, saying things like ‘it’s fine just calm down’, ‘just cheer up’ or even ‘you don’t have depression or anxiety, stop attention seeking’ (all real life examples) and those people 1) aren’t worth your time and 2) when you’re feeling low anyway, just don’t surround yourself with these people if it’s possible. Seek support in the people that really love and care about you.
  4. Spend some time outside – a gentle walk (as opposed to an exercise walk, I’m very unfit so walking is exercise for me), just sitting in the garden or even sit near an open window if that’s what works for you but just being near fresh air, taking a deep breath and having a few moments of calm can be really beneficial, especially if you’re in a moment of panic. Maybe meditate if that’s your jam! I’d like to be at a point that exercise is my go to when I’m feeling low or anxious but I’m not there yet, because I’m very unfit but the wheels are in motion and it’s officially a work in progress.
  5. Listen to your body – sometimes, all you want to do is lie in bed and sob uncontrollably and not have dinner because you messed up a new recipe and the thought of eating is scary and makes you feel physically ill (cough cough), this probably isn’t the healthiest tip but sometimes, you need to just let yourself be sad. The important bit of this part is if you’re going to let yourself wallow, is that you don’t continue it – it’s a short term thing! Let yourself be sad and not eat (just, an example) for that one night or one day and then the following day, eat properly, get some stuff done, get back to it. Letting yourself wallow in feelings isn’t a bad thing as long as you know it’s temporary and short term. Maybe you won’t feel better the next day but the wallowing is done.

I’m not a mental health professional and I don’t recommend that anyone takes any advice from this, I know that I like engaging with content like this because talking about mental health is important and should be talked about. I don’t know if this will help, but I’m trying.

Mental health is a tricky topic – it’s incredibly individual and what works positively for one person might not have the same effect on someone else, so it’s about working on listening to your own body and figuring out what makes that ache in your chest go away.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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taking a break – disappearing from the internet

2017, lifestyle, photography, student

Hello,

It’s been a long time since I last uploaded a blog post. In fact, I didn’t upload anything at all in July – the last post I wrote was about the 24 hour gaming marathon I did at the end of June and then July just got away from me.

I felt like I needed July – June was so manic busy and I just thought July was going to be my month for myself. And in a way it was because I didn’t blog at all in the month. But it was because I was quite busy and I had a lot going on in my head and I just couldn’t focus enough to write a blog post.

I needed space – I’ve talked about how I’ve been having a bit of a blogging crisis recently and most of it is because I gave myself a schedule of uploading three times a week and whilst the regularity was good for me at the time and it made me upload consistently, I felt so detached and ingenuine in what I was writing. Everything felt formulaic and as if I was doing it for followers and that’s not what I want from my blog and I’ve figured out a way to try and combat this.

Rather than making a list of ideas and allotting them to specific days and uploading three days a week and sticking rigidly to a schedule, the way I’m going to try having a list of post ideas and just working on them one at a time – writing one out, playing around with the draft and making it the best it can be and making sure I have good pictures without giving myself the time limit or the deadline of getting it up by a certain time on a certain day.

I want my posts to be more genuine and be a truer reflection of me – I feel like my blog and the words on it aren’t an expression of who I am and I want to spend the time on my blog to make my words mean something.

I miss writing, even writing this post feels a little bit like coming home and I’m glad to have got the ball rolling again. Having a month off was completely unexpected, but I think I needed it to reach a conclusion, make a plan and find the focus to want to get my love for blogging back.

I’m not sure any of this made sense, but I’m excited and glad to be writing again.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

 

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Depression | Update Monday

2016

Hello,

I’d be lying if I said that these past couples of months hadn’t been a struggle. I’ve been trying to document my workout regime and weight loss and the writing of a 100,000 word book in two months but it’s not been anything like that and every other post has been a story of extreme ups and downs.

This month I’ve been feeling very sporadically – I’ll be sad for absolutely no reason (which is literally what depression is, I know) with no kind of stimulus, it’s just like my brain shuts down and my chest hurts and I don’t want to move and I just want to sit and eat and not exist.

In June I was busy, productive and happy – I was packing to move out of halls, I was getting lots of shifts at work. My mind was occupied both in terms of having something to do and in that I was blogging every day so creatively I was completely on top of everything – every post seemed to be about organisation in June because that was how I felt, super organised and in control.

Since then I’ve just felt empty. I’m still blogging and I did a lot of editing for YouTube and I’m trying to be as creative as I can be. I’m working as much as I can and trying to keep myself busy but I just don’t feel as satisfied, I don’t feel like I’m doing anything. The only way I can describe how I feel a lot of the time is sadness, in it’s simplest, most basic form.

I don’t want to sleep – every night I just lie awake and it’s like my body is trying to punish itself because I just have no desire to sleep. I think such awful, dark thoughts that I actually scare myself, I’m surprised that I’m letting myself think these things.

Often I just feel completely lack lustre and have no energy, even to do things that normally make me really happy – like writing, making videos and even working out, to some extent.

And don’t even get me started on feeling tired literally 100% of the time.

That’s why I couldn’t stick to working out or actually rewriting my book – because I’m genuinely afraid of failure and to face that I’m already failing by being so behind, just makes me want to ignore it and not acknowledge it but I can’t; I feel guilty for not being motivated.

I’m so scared of getting help, the thought of trying to tell another human being what goes on in my head, particularly when they’re a GP Doctor who really doesn’t care about me at all and won’t believe anything I have to say as anything more than ‘she’s a hormonal student being melodramatic’.

I’ve tried talking to people, people I trust and a couple of professionals but no one quite seems to get it and a lot of the time I get told that I’m definitely feeling one way when I know that inside I’m not. I can’t go through that again.

I don’t really know what I’m doing or the point of this post. I am getting better at handling myself and trying to push through the down days and pull myself out of it.

I guess I’m okay, just not right now.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

 

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