improving my odds

2019, career, goals, lifestyle

Hello!

My notes for today’s post simply read – ‘call to the universe – I need work, a sign, a break, something, please’. And yes, I love to believe in a higher power and there really is a path for each person to follow and not a blank open plane but I don’t know if asking the universe is going to really help.

It’s a balance – internally, I’m always thinking ‘but this’ ‘but that’ – I don’t think there’s any harm in putting it out there what you want. I’ve done this before with an ‘ask the universe’ post – and everything in that post still stands.

But nothing’s going to change if I don’t work for it.  Tweeting about how I’d love more subscribers or how I can’t think of anything better than running social media channels for a band on tour and maybe one day someone will notice and will make my dreams come true.

I don’t even know where to start doing the maths on how many billions to one those chances are though? If I really want to leave it to chance, I might as well put the work in to improve the odds.

Going back to the path analogy – feeling like there’s a path already set for us can feel restricting, like we have no free will or choice, but thinking about how there’s a huge expanse of possibilities can be incredibly daunting. I like to think that somewhere in the universe, there’s something that at least vaguely knows where we’re going, giving us multiple paths to choose from. Maybe I’m thinking too much about it or I believe too much in a higher power but whilst I think there’s something that knows our future, I don’t think shouting to a void (or social media) will help or hinder anything.

So I go back to the original notes I made for this post – ‘call to the universe – I need work, a sign, a break, something, please’. I’d love a sign – if there’s a higher power, if it could send a sign my way that would be fan-bloody-tastic! A sign, a break, all of the above please. But the world doesn’t work like that – if I spend my whole life waiting for a sign I’m going to look back having wasted it.

This is me, not waiting, not calling the universe but thanking it – thanking it for giving me the strength to carry on, the confidence to step into the unknown and the passion to make my own path when I can’t find one to follow.

Writing this has been the most ‘stream of consciousness’ blog post I’ve written for a very long time – today hasn’t been my day, to be honest but even reading over my own blog plan, seeing my own past plea made me think, you know what? I have the power to stop this and I’m going to work to make my own change.

2019 hasn’t necessarily gone the way I’d hoped so far, there’s lots of milestones I thought I would have already hit but I can’t waste time thinking of what could have been – I’m going to work to hit the goals I’ve set for myself and if I don’t, I’ll readjust and keep working. Because otherwise my life is going to carry on and I won’t really be in it.

I hope you can take something away from this post. Maybe it was a self-indulgent ramble to reach a somewhat melodramatic conclusion, but maybe it wasn’t.

Thank you so much for reading,

Sophie xx

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New Year’s Resolutions 2019

2019, career, goals, lifestyle

Hello!

Guys and gals, a year of making myself mini goals every month (and January Goals are coming your way, don’t you worry) and I have the most organised, the most ‘me’ resolutions I ever could have made.

I’ve got two lists – one split into three categories and another which is more like a bucket list of goals for the year. I’m not going to blither on in the pre-amble because I think this post it probably going to get long!

Firstly, the categories – they’re the same as my resolutions for last year but a little more refined!

[ p e r s o n a l : ]

  • work towards my weight goal – eat well, build a workout routine

Since I’ve started seeing progress towards the end of last year, I’m more motivated than ever to see my goals through this year – over the next 12 months I definitely think I can reach my current goal but I’m leaving myself the flexibility to adapt these goals too.

  • prioritise tasks and make time for hobbies – stop caring about ‘productivity’ so much

This is kind of a double edged sword – on one hand, I want to put less importance on productivity, but also I want to value what I’m doing more and get more done during the day so I’m not sat in the evening pretending to work. I’d rather leave my laptop upstairs and make a better use of my time! I’m really going to reevaluate how I make my to do lists this year so I can get more done during the day and not spend the evening ‘finishing bits off’ and I can make time for the things I want to do.

  • self esteem, I need some

Whether it’s a bit of therapy or more personal reflection, but I’d like to feel more confident in myself this year.

[ c a r e e r : ]

  • build a freelance career – make my own work, be my own boss, be a superhero woman (essentially)

Having officially gone freelance in the last month of 2018, now I’ve got a whole new challenge to face in 2019 – not getting a job, but finding work. I’m both excited and terrified of it but the only way I can change my situation is to work on it so I’m going to make it work.

  • build my over media kit

I have my gorgeous little Canon EOS M10 but I want to build my own kit for events and work – on my dream wish list in a new DSLR and two lenses but I’ll develop this depending on the financial situation and what I need. Any recommendations from any media friends would be spectacular!

  • make a future plan with work goals, life goals, travel goals, aspirations etc

I love the idea of having a 3 or 5 year plan but what I’ve learnt from this time last year is that I need it to be more flexible and adaptable. So my goal is to make some sort of plan that I can adapt and change as and when, but more long term goals to focus on.

[ c r e a t i v e : ]

  • continue towards making the most genuine ‘me’ content on my blog and YouTube channel

I had a bit of a revelation at the end of 2018 that I felt a bit fake online and I’m definitely making more of an effort to make what I really love and what I’m passionate about and I’m excited to explore that more this year.

  • write a book? finish something? write more than I did in 2018? maybe some freelance writing?

Months like NaNoWriMo work really well for me so I’ve planned a few more writing challenges throughout the month so maybe by the end of the year I might have something to show for it!

  • work on photography – need to solidify basic knowledge and then work with better equipment

I love photography and I’m confident in my ability to take photos, but I think because I didn’t study photography at school, I got a little bit left behind with the real basics of photography at uni so I really want to go back and practice the basics.

[ t e n   g o a l s : ]

  1. Have a PT session – I want to know more about weight training and how to workout properly and I feel like for me I need to start with some professional advice so when I can drive and afford it, I’ll go to a gym and book a session.
  2. Get another tattoo – it’s getting towards two years since I got a tattoo and I want another one before the two year mark, so hopefully I can save for that.
  3. Read a book a month – I have so many books I haven’t read, so going to aim for 12 books this year!
  4. Do a grid drawing every month – I think it was two years ago I did a drawing challenge where I printed out a line drawing, divided it into the number of squares in the month and colour in one square every day. I think it’ll be less committed than a colour book but make me do a little something artistic every day, I’m excited about this one.
  5. Listen to more new music – I want to use my discover weekly playlists on Spotify and find some new artists to listen to. 2018 was the year of nostalgia and finding comfort in music I already loved and I think finding new music will really motivate me this year.
  6. Save for a new media kit – linked to one of my career goals, I really want to buy a new camera or at least be on my way to buying one next year.
  7. Have a little trip away with my boyfriend every month – I’m not saying I want to go on a full on holiday every month, just a little weekend, going to see friends, a little bit of European travel maybe, I definitely want to have a weekend in London for Winter Wonderland this year because I’ve never bin. Gonna change that!
  8. Take my driving test and upgrade my car – I’m so in love with driving at the moment and I’m hoping to have taken my test by April (ish) and my car, however lovely it is, I would like to get a newer car that I trust to take on longer drives across the country. 2019 is the Year of the Car, I’m so excited about it.
  9. Improve my posture – very, very different scale but being someone who’s always been tall for their age, I always compensated when I was younger by hunching over and trying not to stand out too much. Now I want to have better posture and strengthen the muscles in my back.
  10. Find somewhere to live/get our own place – my boyfriend and I had always planned to find our own place basically as soon as we finished our contract in our student house but nothing worked out as planned so going into 2019, we have a vague idea of what we’re going to do but I would so love to have our own place by the end of the year.

But who knows where the year can take us! One of the biggest things I’ve learnt since last year is that they goals can’t be set in stone – it will only lead to disappointment in the long run if I things change or what I want changes.

Either way, I’m really excited about this and working on the goals this year is really going to help me focus and make progress. Can’t wait!

Thank you so much for reading,

Sophie xx

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2018 Resolutions Review

2018, career, goals, lifestyle

Hello!

We’re getting to my favourite time of year where I get to write all the goals posts – today is the first with my review of the goals I set myself at the beginning of 2018.

Right now, when I think back on the year I think pretty positively – I’m just starting to pave a freelance career for myself, my mental health is getting better, I’ve had a wonderful Christmas with my gorgeous family, my relationship is something I truly treasure, things are looking good. However they’re looking very different to what 2017 Sophie was hoping for herself and it’s a little disheartening to be honest, but paths change and just because it’s different doesn’t mean it’s wrong!

I like splitting my New Year’s Resolutions into 3 categories with their own goals, so I’ll go through each one before drawing a conclusion.

[ p e r s o n a l : ]

  • find a workout/healthy eating routine – this took a lot of attempts and times but in the last quarter of the year I really settled into this and I’m really motivated going into 2019!
  • eat 3 meals a day – I now eat breakfast basically every day so that’s quite a big step I’ve made this year.
  • make long term changes to how I handle money – this was amazing at the beginning of the year, then my last student loan came in, I didn’t get a job and it all went a bit mental. Money is tight and something I’m still figuring out how to be good at but I’ve got to make it work or I can’t live so this one carries over.
  • make sure to stick to my bullet journal – I properly fell in love with my bullet journal again this year and I’m just starting my third journal, I love it so much.

[ u n i v e r s i t y / c a r e e r : ]

  • expand on my 3 year plan – I basically abandoned my 3 year plan because it wasn’t very flexible, so it didn’t work out very well at all. Admire the optimism of 2017 me though!
  • graduate with at least a 2:1 – I did this, I really wanted to set myself the goal of getting a first but I’m so glad I didn’t because it would have made being so close even more heartbreaking (this still kind of hurts to be brutally honest)
  • marketing work experience at Sky and apply for grad scheme – applied for both, got rejected from both, rejections really knocked my confidence this year to be honest
  • take every opportunity available – this was a dumb resolution to be honest because opportunities don’t just present themselves and if I wanted things to happen I needed to make them! And also, sometimes you have to say no – I was offered a chance to do paid social media work in the Netherlands earlier this year but it was so close to my final uni deadline that I didn’t want to jeopardise that and I had to say no. That doesn’t mean I wasted an opportunity, it meant I prioritised what’s important so all round – dumb resolution!

creative

  • maintain blog and YouTube channels more consistently – it took some time, but I did upload vlogs from 52 weeks, I wrote an awful lot of blog posts and I’m really proud of the routine I’ve made for myself and I’ve properly fallen in love with both platforms again.
  • read more blog posts – I really did try to find more blogs to read but I’m not a fan of the stereotypical fashion, beauty bloggers so I tried to read more, but I didn’t find a lot that stuck (always looking for recommendations!)
  • keep writing – I set myself three writing challenges this year and I’m really proud of myself! I really enjoy writing and I love that I made time for it this year.
  • keep making new things / take the most unconventional approach possible / find my flare – these three I’ve grouped because they’re just a bit passive aren’t they? They don’t mean anything? I’ve made a big effort to be more genuine in every aspect of content online recently so I guess that might count as ‘finding my flare’ but all round? 2017 me was a bit pretentious about creativity.

Overall, I didn’t achieve a lot that I set myself last year but despite how much my lack of self esteem would try to convince me otherwise, that doesn’t make me a failure – I’ve learnt a lot this year and made my own path when a ‘traditional’ approach didn’t work out for me. I’ve grown a lot as a person this year (as I think I said last year) and I’m so proud of where I am and where I’m going – so a mixed bag of resolutions, but I’m happy regardless.

Next week I’ll have my 2019 goals (which I’m really excited about) and my January goals and then we’ll be back to some more varied content! I love setting goals and checking in on myself even if it’s not always positive, it really motivates me and I hope it can be motivating to others too!

Thank you so much for reading,

Sophie xx

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I think this is a game plan… (Diary 3)

2018, career, fitness, lifestyle, writing

Hello!

When I planned to write this post (though, side note, should I write a post about how I plan my content?) I was expecting to write about how I was taking a step back from applying for jobs – I’ve been applying basically non-stop since about March and nothing had come from it other than a lot of money spent on three unsuccessful interviews and a whole ton of rejection emails. So I was going to talk about making the most of my time at home, working and saving as much as I could, finish learning to drive and try again next year – when all the graduate schemes are open again and hopefully this time I’ll find something that works for me.

But, if you haven’t guessed already, that’s not what I can write about because it’s not true for me any more.

I found basically the perfect job – part time flexible hours at first, building into something more over next year, being a PA and Admin Assistant and PR Exec and Social Media Assistant all in one, it’s local, I can carry on with my volunteering and work at my dance school, it was just perfect. And after a very informal, chatty interview last week I’ve got the position! Official Freelancer with work coming in, need to figure out invoices and maybe get an accountant kind of work and I still can’t quite believe it (but I’m so excited about it).

It’s only sods law that two other jobs that would be pretty brilliant have cropped up too but will see how all of that goes – things are kind of working out for me and after feeling like everything was a bit piggly (just for you Miss Debbie!) and I’d been left with the crap at the bottom of the barrel for months now, I don’t think I couldn’t be happier about it.

So what’s going to be the focus of my ‘diary’ post now? Well I got a job, I’m loving my home life of volunteering at my dance school and going back to tap classes, alongside that I’m really enjoying working out and eating healthy and I’m seeing results (unfitness update coming up in the next few weeks!), I’ve worked on really shortening my to do lists and prioritising the things that really need doing and that’s working really well for my productivity and overall I’ve feeling fulfilled, busy and motivated.

Obviously, not 100% of the time – I don’t want to talk about the bad stuff here (I half have a post planned for that too), I want to talk about the good times right now but for transparency’s sake, I wanted to clarify that I’ve not turned my life around to being a happy, productivity person every single day because no one is, that would just be ridiculous.

But I’m feeling really good right now!

November has also been extra busy because I’ve been taking part in NaNoWriMo and it’s stressful, but really inspiring to be a part of this community that wants everyone to be a winner, no matter how many words they’ve written! I may be behind on my word count but I’ve written 27,037 words in just 20 days starting from nothing? That’s actually insane! (Just don’t think too hard about the people who wrote 50k in three days because that is just mental)

One of the things I said in my ‘things I’d tell my teenage self‘ video has really stuck with me since I made it – everything is hard work. If you want something to be the best it can be, it’s going to be hard work but once you’ve accepted that, put the work in to whatever you’re passionate about, then it’s so rewarding. I’m throwing myself headfirst into my freelance position and I’m going to make a life for myself – no ifs, buts or maybes, I’m going to do it.

And it’s going to be brilliant.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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the performer never dies

2018, career, lifestyle

Hello!

So yesterday I posted a cover on my channel for the first time in a long time – volunteering at my old dance school and being surrounded by dancers and performers and singing at the top of my lungs as much as I can has made my really crave performing again. So I wanted to film a cover – something nice and simple to start off with and hopefully working up to something bigger when I’ve trained my voice up again.

Do I want anything from this cover video? No, not really, I just enjoy performing and right now YouTube is the only platform I’ve got. If someone came up to me tomorrow and said hello would you like a career on the West End/a recording contract/being in your dream band would I take it? Yes, probably.

Because I think anyone who has ever been passionate about an element of performing, whether it be dancing, singing, acting or anything in between, will always think about what would have happened if they’d stuck it out, gone to drama school or tried harder at dance class?

That’s not to say that I regret my past decisions – I love the path I’ve taken, the people I’ve met along the way and the career that I’m building for myself, but there’s always going to be that part of me that wonders what could have been and longs for the stage.

In all reality, if someone put me on a stage in front of a few thousand people I’d freeze – I wouldn’t be able to sing, let alone sing well, I probably couldn’t dance for the life of me and I’m not really an actor at the best of times.

It’s all about if, buts and maybes – what if I’d tried? But I don’t really think I could do it. But wouldn’t it be fun? But it would be scary! And so on and so on.

It’s a weird position to be in, because I don’t want anything from it but I think about it a lot.

So what’s the point of this blog post? I’m not sure, mostly to get this feeling down in words because it’s something I’ve kind of thought about since a friend who was auditioning for dance school when we were 9 or 10 said that I should audition with her and I didn’t even bother asking my parents because I knew they’d say no (always fought to be one of those child actors I did, dreamt of being a Disney Channel girl!). When I was that age I always wanted to be a singer or an actress, so going into social media management is a huge curveball to my childhood dreams but what can I say? Everything happens for a reason.

Here’s a link to the video if you wanted to watch it!

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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seeing #TheCircleFinal live!

2018, career, lifestyle

Hello!

A rather exciting post today – I’ve not really spoken about it on social media (for some reason I felt like I wasn’t allowed to, though I’m not sure how true that is?) but I was invited to the live studio to watch The Circle Final and it was so incredibly surreal.

So grab a cuppa lads (it’s my new buzzword, apparently I can’t stop myself) because here’s a story all about how I got to watch the live studio show of the Circle Final.

So a little summary, for anyone who has no idea what The Circle is – it was a show on Channel 4 that, essentially, was all about popularity to win £50,000! It started with 8 contestants who were all in isolated flats, they made profiles (not all being completely honest) on a social media platform called the Circle and it was the only way they could communicate with each other. They then rate each other and the most popular players had the power to block other players and new players came in and there were lots of different ways that people were blocked and I thoroughly recommend watching it on All4 if you haven’t seen it already.

And I’m sure this is the question on everyone’s minds – how in god’s name did someone like me get invited to watch the live studio final of a Channel 4 show? WELL I love a bit of live tweeting and I got very into this show, so I was tweeting about it every single night. The Circle was sponsored by giffgaff and most nights they’d tweet me and we’d chat about the show. I don’t know why they noticed my tweets over anyone else’s but they did and just three days before the final (and before I filmed my favourite TV shows video – this Sophie had no idea what would happen to her) they offered me a ticket! I was cheeky and asked for a plus one so I could bring my boyfriend with me and somehow, is wasn’t a prank?

Then I had to do some sneaky cheeky planning – they gave me a rough idea of the area and where the event would be, as Channel 4 weren’t sending out the full details until the Monday) but having a quick look at trains, we wouldn’t have been able to get home until around 3am and that’s not my jam, y’know?

So the whole reason I started watching the show is because one of my best friends from uni and housemate for basically three years, Nick, is working on it as his first project in his new job and we wanted to support him. And then from episode 1 I was hooked. But Nick working on the show meant I could ask him what train station we would be going to, where the nearest hotels were and it was very convenient. I do feel like I was cheating a little bit but being spontaneous isn’t quite in me – I like planning and knowing what’s happening and being prepared so I needed to book trains and hotels so I asked Nick.

I can be spontaneous, but it depends what the spontaneity is and how much planning would usually go into it – I can manage an unplanned pub night and a live TV final three days in advance, but people who decide they’re going to go to Europe for the weekend on a Friday morning just makes my chest ache. It’s something I want to work on because I love the idea of being someone who goes to Europe for the weekend.

The journey itself wasn’t actually great – we had to get a bus to the train station because I live in the middle of nowhere and mum was at work and I thought getting on a bus at 2 and hanging round the shopping centre near the train station for a few hours would be fine because it would be better than getting a bus around school time but it just meant we were bored af for like nearly three hours and then we gave up and went to the train station early and we watched two trains go to Kings Cross on time and nice and early and then our train was delayed.

Sod’s law.

Then we got to London, got on the underground to Paddington, Paddington was confusing af and then our third train was delayed too and this is when I started getting really anxious. We weren’t going to have time to go to the hotel and check in or even to get food (which we hadn’t had any of since lunch) and I was worried about being late and there was a lot of nervous excitement.

It was fine – we got there in plenty of time, Nick came and found us in the queue and we got to catch up with him and everything was a-okay.

The building actually has a giant circle light on it, it’s insane.

So let’s get back to the fun bit!

We were told to be there for 8, even though the episode wouldn’t start on Channel 4 until 10 and we were doing in the meantime. We soon found out. Because that’s how time works.

At first, we were checked in – we had to sign a release form that basically said we didn’t mind being on camera and then we were given wristbands. I didn’t expect to get a gold VIP wristband but I definitely felt pretty swish. At this point we were offered free drinks and cloakroom facilities and then we sat in a lecture theatre for, like, over an hour, just waiting for something to happen. It was quite confusing. About 9.15pm we were taken over to the studio set and this is where the anxiety started to dissolve and it got really exciting.

From there, it was just standing – but the studio looked amazing, it was so exciting to be in a real TV studio having been around so many people at uni (three of which were working on the show) and to actually be part of a real life studio show was actually mental, I still can’t really believe it happened but getting into the studio was just the beginning.

More and more people filed in, then all the previously blocked players came in and sat down and presenters Alice Levine and Maya Jama started doing rehearsals and it was so surreal – I felt like I somewhat understood, the roles of the people in the studio, the presenters, the floor managers, all the mics and cameras and autocue’s and the countdowns, but so far from it because it was so professional and polished and way beyond anything I was capable of or had experienced before.

We started off stood by Alex’s girlfriend Millie and apparently you could see us in the background of the shot and then we were around Sian’s family and wow, Sian’s mum is actually the nicest human I’ve ever met. Then we were moved over to the other side of the room and for like 10 minutes we could actually see and then some other guys just moved in front of us but I think they were something to do with a Radio 1 DJ but still, bit rude.

The whole show was incredibly surreal – seeing the people that I’ve been watching on TV every day for three weeks, even though they’ve been in complete isolation from the outside world for the whole time and have no idea the impact the show has made and how much they mean to people. I was in awe and I felt like the most pathetic fangirl ever but it was just so exciting.

The end of the show was somewhat anticlimactic – the show ended and there wasn’t really a conclusion, we were just told to leave. I got some photos in front of the flats, then we collected our stuff from the cloakroom, wondered over towards our Premier Inn via the 24 hour Asda for the dinner we never had and checked in just before midnight, collapsing with incredibly painful knees from standing for so long, sleeping in my favourite kind of bed of all time and waking up to go for breakfast with Nick before a day at the Natural History museum.

Our mini Asda haul

To be honest, I’m surprised Alex won, I was rooting for Sian but not disappointed with the overall winner. Excited to see what they do with a potential second season!

And to think this was only the beginning of the week! It was amazing couple of days and I’m so grateful to giffgaff and Channel 4 for inviting me to the show.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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my dream job | #asktheuniverse

2018, career, lifestyle, photography, student

Hello!

I’ve always been a big advocate of if you want something, ask for it because you never know who might have that contacts to help you get to where you want to be. That’s why I made a video in 2014 about my dream job (click here for foetus Sophie) and that’s why I love that ‘#asktheuniverse’ seems to have become a thing.

So why not write my own #asktheuniverse post, right?

I thought I’d write about three jobs which I would just love to do, because there are so many things that I’d get so excited about having the opportunity to do and I think I would be really good at, so here’s me asking the universe!

  • social media in live music – being on Insta stories every night of a tour, responding to fans on twitter, making short tour vlogs for each night for Facebook and YouTube  – it would be manic busy but it’s something I would absolutely love, travelling to new parts of the world and experiencing live music every night makes my heart race just thinking about it. This has essentially been my dream job since I was about 17 but I think it would be just so much fun and the creative energy would be insane.
  • creative digital media – this one’s a little vague but being able to combine copywriting, videography and photography online or on social media is something I’ve thoroughly enjoyed doing and for a certain brand or TV channel or right creative personality, I think it would be a super exciting and engaging career to build on.
  • writing books – I’ve been creative writing since I was 12 years old in 2008 and I kind of fell out of love with it when I went to uni because I just didn’t have the time to write creatively every night like I did when I was at home. As of recent I’ve got back into it and I’ve always been passionate about the story I wrote when I was 16 and I went to develop it and make it into a full series and work on a film adaptation! I just love the idea of working on a project that’s such a dear part of your heart and sharing that with an audience and having people write fanfiction about it – imagine having an audience that cared about your characters that much? I’m aiming for the next Harry Potter, obviously.
  • Overwatch: A Netflix series – I’m aware that the only video game I play and is Overwatch and I definitely can’t call myself a gamer but I love it so much. Mostly because, the company that makes the game, Blizzard, are just so thorough with their character creation – there’s currently 28 heroes (I think?) and they’ve all got in depth back stories and connections to each other and the overarching story is really interesting and ongoing and I think it could be an actually incredible series on Netflix but it would take a lot of prep, a lot of character mapping and a whole team to make potentially 28 characters come together. Imagine the season finale it would be so incredible and I’d love to be part of the creative writing process, even the filming, editing and promotions process. Fully involved yes please.

Or, I would like to be in Flash please. Because deep down, the performing arts part of me still loves the idea of being an actor but I have no training nor do I actually think I’d be very good at it. But I might be, who knows?

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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New Years Resolutions – Mid Year Review

2018, lifestyle, photography, student, travel

Hello!

Considering most of the blog posts I write and publish at the moments are goals related, whether it be monthly mini goals, summer goals, post-uni goals or anything else, it’s not a surprise that at the end of June I wanted to take a look back at my goals from the beginning of the year.

The fact we’re halfway through 2018 is still blowing my mind – I can’t believe it!

This one’s going to be a long one so get yourself a beverage and a snack, let’s just jump right in.

[ PERSONAL ]

  • Find a workout / healthy eating routine : I’d like to say it’s kind of a work in progress but I’m not sure it is. I’m trying my best but it’s something I’m really struggling with. I have lost a little bit of weight and I’m slowly figuring out the ways that work best for me but it’s not the ‘fitness journey’ I wanted. Essentially I’m nowhere near as fit as I want to be but there’s still another six months!
  • Eat three meals a day : I just don’t feel hungry first thing in the morning, I can’t bring myself to eat breakfast unless I’m really in the mood. And maybe this is just my brain being a bit dumb, but whilst I”m trying to loose weight I can’t get to grips with the notion of putting even more food in my body? Probably wrong, but part of the reason I’ve not made more of an effort to include breakfast in my routine!
  • Make a budgeting plan and stick to it : well, this went really well between January and April – my loan came in, I had a plan, it went well, good job me. April onwards however has been a different story – after I finished my degree I went a bit ‘reward spending’ mad. Then the fact that I don’t have a job and I was moving home and I didn’t know how long I’d have to make the money last freaked me out and I clearly my way of coping with that was spending money. I’m not good at money. Will be easier to budget when I have a job.
  • Make sure to stick to bullet journal : definitely going with this one right now! I literally don’t leave the house without it and everything I do gets written in this book, it’s helping me feel a bit more sane in the expanse of being an unemployed graduate.

[ UNIVERSITY / CAREER ]

  • Expand 3 year plan + research career goals : I’ve completely changed my three year plan – I realised it was just a progression that seemed to fit going into a career I didn’t actually want! All a work in progress but I just want to work at this point, so my much more short term plan is find a job.
  • Graduate with at least a 2:1 : when I made this goal I had my heart set on a first but I knew if I set the goal at a first and didn’t get one it would hurt more than not getting a first. And despite working my ass off for it, I just missed out on a first so I’m glad I had that forethought. But I am getting a very high 2:1 and I graduate in a few days!
  • Marketing work experience at Sky + grad scheme : this was part of my three year plan, I don’t really want to go into marketing – I’m creative, I need to make things, particularly making videos and taking photos which I don’t think I’d get from being in marketing (please do correct me if I’m wrong!), so kind of scrapping this goal. Though I do think Sky is a great company and I would like to work for them at some point!
  • Take every opportunity available : I kind of want to adapt this one – to making opportunities for myself. I had to turn down some amazing paid work in the Netherlands earlier this year because it would have meant sacrificing the quality of my FMP and it just wasn’t a sensible option. But I have made the opportunity to make my FMP something that’s relevant to my future and I’ve made some great contacts and friends with the people I’ve interviewed and it’s a project I’m so proud of I can’t describe it. So this year is for making opportunities.

[ CREATIVE ]

  • Maintain blog and YouTube more consistently : though I have criticised myself for not being consistent and not making the content I want to make at the right time, I’m making way more than I did in my previous year’s at university! I’ve really fallen back in love with both platforms and I spend far more time making content that I feel represents me than I have made in the past. In the case of this blog, it’s predominantly lists which I feel is a bit too representative of me!
  • Keep writing : I’ve been trying to do more creative writing this year and I wouldn’t say it’s gone particularly well. However there’s been a slight development in the first few days of July – I’m a big fan of the NaNoWriMo challenge and charity and whilst the main 30 day writing challenge is in November, they do other monthly challenges throughout the year called ‘Camp NaNoWriMo‘. I thought it would be a good idea for me to partake because it makes me dive head first into writing and I don’t have any plans for July – I don’t have a job or uni or anything, I wanted something to keep me focused and productive and so far it has! in 6 days I’ve written over 10,000 words of a silly little idea I had. It’s nothing that I’d ever try and publish or produce, it’s just a silly little personal project to get me back into it but I’m loving it so much. Maybe I’ll stop trying to get a job in social media and try and get a book deal instead but I’m way more on track with this goal than I was before.
  • Keep making new things : I’ve been a bit more experimental with my videos on YouTube than I was earlier in the year – I’m trying new things, taking more time and teaching myself more about post-production too. I’ve always loved making video content and that’s where I want to push myself creatively – blogging is more of a relaxing outlet for me, I love writing and I find writing a post comes quite easily so I’m happy with what I’m making for both platforms at the moment.
  • Take the most unconventional approach : I’m not sure what I meant by this back in January, I don’t know if I was trying to be a bit edgy or what. Either way, I’m giving it a go – it kind of worked out with my FMP video so maybe it’s something I need to incorporate in the rest of this year!

So a lot has changed in 6 months but that’s why I think it’s important to check in on long term goals! But I won’t ramble on anymore.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

 

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blogging for myself

2018, lifestyle

Hello!

I follow a lot of bloggers on social media – I’ve watched so many Insta stories about people’s social media plans and how they schedule tweets and post regularly to make sure that as many people as possible see a new post or a new video or follow their Instagram or whatever.

I’ve tried this – I’ve tried scheduling tweets and promoting my content more and you know what? It was exhausting, it never did anything to help more people see my posts and I can’t be bothered anymore.

After I took a break from the internet when I was working on my last university assignments (I say ‘I took a break’ like it was a choice, I didn’t have time to make anything) I decided I couldn’t be bothered to spend ages promoting my posts and videos in scheduled tweets and posts or making Insta stories that no one is going to actually engage with.

I’ve never had that many readers or viewers so why am I stressing myself out over this?

So this isn’t me giving up on blogging or making videos, I’m just going to make content for myself – I don’t need lots of readers to be happy with my blog. I’m not going to mass promote blog posts or YouTube videos anymore.

That’s not to say I’m going to change what I’m writing about or how I’m writing – I still like writing as if I have an audience but I don’t have the time or the motivation to put in the relevant social media (nor do I really have the followers for it to matter!).

It’s not about the numbers! Yes, it’s disheartening when I have a look and they’re the same but at the end of the day, do I care? Not really! I like making things and I can do that regardless of who watches or reads! If my blog or YouTube channel were to become something I could do for a living, I’d rather it would be because people really liked my content and not because I tweeted seven times about a post.

I’d rather save the repeat promo for content I’m really, really proud of like the vlog I uploaded last week which is a bit sad but very raw and I’m very proud of it and it’s linked below.

It’s a tricky balance because I care a lot about my blog and YouTube channel and I really love the content I’m making and I want to share it with people, I think I just need to shake the mindset that I’m doing it for ‘views’ or to ‘grow online’ or for other people and I need to just make things for me.

Thank you for reading (like a lot, I really appreciate it),

Sophie xx

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my latest vlog:

June Mini Goals

2018, lifestyle, student

Hello!

Now that my degree and the consequent brain fuzz have passed (and a week of frantically catching up on content hence two blog posts and five recent video uploads!) I’m properly back on track – I feel focused, I feel productive and I’m ready to set some goals.

MAY GOALS REVIEW:

  1. Content focus: I didn’t do so well with this one at the beginning of the month as I’d just handed in my final project and I needed a break. I then have put out loads of content in the last week which isn’t awful but I can’t maintain it. On the bright side, out of all the content I planned to make in May there was only one video I didn’t make so I made lots, I just didn’t upload regularly at all.
  2. Get a job: I obviously haven’t done this. I’ve applied for the odd job here and there but nothing dedicated – I didn’t do as much research as I intended but I did a bit so not a completely lost cause.
  3. See more films: I saw 2 films at the cinema last month and this month I saw three! It would have been more but I had a look at my bank balance and realised I needed to stop going to the cinema. But I watched Infinity War twice more and saw Deadpool 2, so a very Marvel superheroes heavy month.
  4. Work on portfolio: I did really well with this one! I made a huge list of everything I wanted to include, sourced 70 odd pictures, redesigned my blog and in the process of uploading everything to the portfolio that is now a part of my blog and my portfolio instagram.
  5. Exercise: This one was a massive fail – I didn’t really do anything, I couldn’t stick with what I had planned and I just couldn’t bring myself to exercise, especially because I barely have the space in my house. But I did purchase the BodyBoss workout plan and I started Day 1 of the Pre-Workout this morning so going to try my best to stick to this one and go at my own pace!

JUNE GOALS:

  1. Do something about my mental health: The ‘exercise’ goal from last month was a real highlight that my mental health was the lowest it had ever been, I won’t go into too much detail but this month I need to do something about it. I’ve actually already started on this! On June 1st I booked a doctors appointment but it’s not until the 18th. I might do a whole post about it at some point in the future.
  2. Sort out my sleep schedule: One of my New Years Resolutions for 2017 was to become a morning person and I actually did really well – there was a point by the end of the year and before I finished my degree where I’d naturally wake up around 7am and I’d be in uni by 9am. But now I just can’t do that. This morning I was out of bed by 9am and I think starting this new exercise program will help me get up earlier.
  3. Finish my portfolio: With all the baseline work done, I just need to upload everything now! I’m well on the way to achieving this and additionally, I’d like to have a short showreel on my YouTube channel by the end of the month too.
  4. Keep job hunting: Obviously this is going to keep being a goal until I’ve got a job, but I’ve already got a bunch of links open with jobs I want to apply to so this month should be more successful. Fingers crossed at least!
  5. Stay consistent with content: Calm and focus is going to be my mantra this month – I’m loving my blog and YouTube channel at the moment and making content is something I really enjoy but uploading regularly and consistently has always been my issue. I’ve got a plan and hopefully I’ll stick to it!

There’s a lot going on in my head at the moment so whilst today is a good productive day, tomorrow may now be so I’m not going to push myself but I am going to try my best!

I’ve uploaded about five videos on my channel in the last week so if you want to catch up on those they’re linked down below.

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

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