The thought of writing this post actually makes me stomach turn a little bit because then I have to admit defeat. I’ve done practically nothing this week.
Last night I realised that I’ve actually been in a really bad headspace for a few days now – I don’t want to do anything, the thought of writing my book hurts my stomach, my heart and my head and working out makes me want to cry.
Here’s the update, though it’s mostly just justifying why I’m really rubbish.
I’m still on 2382 words and by this point, I should be hitting 29,034 words and the concept of catching up is becoming a bit of a distant dream. I’m still in chapter one, I’m still just introducing 5 of the 6 core characters in my book and I just can’t face writing any more.
I’m feeling a bit lost – this book is my everything, it’s my baby and I wish I wanted to write it but I’m just not feeling it. I’ve just not been feeling very well recently, both physically and mentally.
In terms of working out, I’ve actually been a little bit more productive than the writing but even then not much. Yesterday I did Day 9 of the workout and today is the 18th and I didn’t workout today because I wasn’t feeling it and it was really, really hot and we went for a super long walk (collecting Pokemon) so I’m justifying not working out when the whole point of the challenges I picked to do are daily-30-day-challenges!
I’m making myself feel even shittier and that’s not going to make me want to do anymore workouts.
Yesterday’s workout consisted of 45 sit ups, 30 crunches, 30 leg raises and a 35 second plank. During my 30 leg raises, Lucas thought I was dying because they kill my back and he joined in for the plank because he’s an ass/he was like ‘I can do a plank for so long’ and I’m like ‘I can do 35 seconds and I’ve done the rest of the workout so I’m more tired’ and it was weird. If he joined in with the rest of the workout it probably would have been more fun!
I’m trying not to push myself too hard because I know that probably won’t help when I’m feeling bad about not being more up to date anyway.
I had a little meltdown.
I’m not sure how much further ‘Update Monday’ will be going because I’ve not really got anything to update so far, but I’ll decide next week depending on how this week goes.
Sorry it’s been such a down post, hopefully I’ll feel better next week – I’m sticking to my Monday, Wednesday, Friday plan if nothing else! And I even got a surprise Sunday post in yesterday!
Thank you for reading,
Uni blog: http://sophieannblogs.blogspot.co.uk/