I’m still not reading or writing! | June

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Hello!

I’ve written about both reading and writing on this blog before – I made a list of books I want to read after Christmas and I wrote a review when I finished ‘Girl Online: On Tour’ and I think I’ve mentioned a few times how much it saddens me that I don’t read as much as I did when I was a kid and I definitely don’t write creatively as much as I did even a year ago (or… at all).

The reading I think phased out when I was 14 or 15, because all my friends read much faster than me and I was teased a little for it. Some part of me must have given up just because it takes me a little bit longer and now the thought of reading a chapter before bed makes my eyes ache – I’m tired enough as it is so holding a book up and concentrating on the words seems to much in comparison to watching a video on my phone.

It doesn’t help that I’m feeling overwhelmingly tired all the time, but that’s a completely different matter.

Another factor, particularly in the reading, is that I’m currently so behind on watching YouTube videos that I almost feel like I would be wasting YouTube-watching time if I was reading, so in my head I’d like to think that when I’m more up to date on YouTube I’ll read more but i’m not very good at being awake enough to read before I go to bed and if I read during the day that’s generally the whole day gone. I’ll find a compromise somewhere otherwise I’ll have to come up with some sort of self-punishment. Maybe I won’t let myself have any books in the new flat if I don’t read some in the summer.

That sounds like a semi-decent idea actually.

Writing is slightly more difficult because it takes me back to a darker time – writing is something I used to make my feel better when I was at school and sixth form and doing it now just reminds me of that. I also used to write with a specific person, we used to write together on MSN and do word sprints and compare ideas and encourage each other and at the time it was literally the best thing in the world, I couldn’t have been more grateful for it but I’m not friends with that person anymore. It brings back a lot of bad memories and sad memories and it’s hard to get over that.

But recently, one of my friends has read the book I wrote in 2012 (it’s been three and a half years!) and it’s really inspired me to write again – that book is my baby and I’m still really super proud of the concept and I really would love to publish it one day but it’s getting over that block of being able to rewrite it.

I want to not be scared of writing my own book anymore.

I miss being totally engrossed in a fictional world!

An idea I had while writing this blog post was to incorporate reading and writing into part of my summer plans – June is for blogging, July is for working out and I think I’m going to read and write every day in August!

To make my book the length I want it to be, I’d have to write 1640 words every day for July and August but I think that’s a challenge I can work up to – plan in the rest of June and then write in July and August! Now I’m excited and have a lot of planning to do!

I’m going to actually amend it this time!

Thank you for reading,

Sophie xx

 

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